The Not So Excellent Quest for Harmonia
by Olympian876
Summary: Harmonia's missing. So Percy and the gang find her. Collaboration with maximumride123 and HuntressOfTheSky13.
1. Chapter 1

After the Second Olympian War, Percy and Annabeth were a little jumpy, literally. They were at the Big House jumping uncontrollably. Up and down, up and down. Chiron went up to them, "Percy?"

"Chiron."

"Annabeth?"

"Chiron."

"Percy?"

"Chiron."

"Huh?"

"That's right."

"What the Hades are you doing?"

"Jumping. Duh." Annabeth replied.

"Why?"

"Ever since the war we've felt... jumpy."

"Oh no... The worst has happened"

"What?"

"This means one thing..."

"What?"

"Lady Gaga's here..." Chiron said eerily.

"Actually I saw her earlier" Percy replied.

Suddenly Gaga appeared out of nowhere.

"AH! EVIL!" Annabeth yelled.

She drew her knife and stabbed Gaga five times until she died, "Annabeth! You killed a famous pop star!"

" Oh… I thought she was a monster…"

"How did you figure that?"

"Wasn't Lady Gaga called a 'fame monster'?"

Then there was awkward silence. It was so awkward, you heard a cricket.

"Anyway, where were we?" Annabeth asked as if nothing happened.

"Harmonia's missing!"

"A harmonica's missing?"

"NO! Harmonia! Will you please stop jumping?" Chiron yelled.

Percy and Annabeth stopped in midair, "Sorry, what?"

"Ugh. Okay. Harmonia would always bring peace after war. Without her we're doomed!"

"Where is she?"

"Central Park. You're probably going to have to walk all the way there."

"What? That's impossible!"

"You got to Hollywood and back in ten days."

"That was Hollywood. This is going to Central Park! Help us!"

"Well, you can bring one more on your journey. And consult the Oracle."

"Sure. Oracle first."

Percy and Annabeth plopped back on the ground and walked to Rachel the Oracle, "Hey Rachel!"

"Hi."

"Give us a prophecy. We're going to Central Park."

"Can I come?" Rachel asked hopefully.

"No! Give us a prophecy!"

"Sure! Hmmm." Rachel closed her eyes and began:

"Go two miles north.

Then eat breakfast

Then turn right.

Find Harmonia, done."

Rachel opened her eyes and asks, "Good?"

"Great! Thanks!"

"So who are we going to bring along with us?"

"How about Grover?"

"No, let's bring someone who actually eats healthy and exercises. He's too fat!"

"Come on Percy. Please?"

"Okay, fine!"

Percy and Annabeth walked over to Grover, "Grover! Grover! Grover! Grover!"

"Yeah?" Grover asked excitedly.

"We're going to Central Park!"

"Yeah!" Grover yelled and high-fived Percy.

"But guys, we're going to Central Park! That's a far way from Camp Half-Blood. Two whole miles. We need to get some supplies!"

"Okay!"

"We need blankets, sunscreen, glasses, and towels! It's a two mile walk, guys. It might be days if we run, weeks if we walk!"

"Okay. Let's have fifteen minutes to get our stuff then we'll meet back here. Agreed?"

"Agreed."

Percy went to go get some of his stuff. Annabeth did the same. And Grover? He sat down. After a few minutes they were back with their supplies. Percy brought Riptide and an iPod. Annabeth brought a teddy bear and her diary. And Grover? He brought candy. So they stood up and skipped out of Camp Half-Blood unaware of the dangers ahead of them


	2. Chapter 2

Forty-seven seconds after leaving Camp Half-Blood, Percy asks, "Did you hear something?"

"Probably Grover's stomach..." Annabeth snorted, looking at the fat goat-man distastfully.

"Hey!" Grover shot back, "Oh... Um, she's probably right. I'm hungry...Where's that candy..." He asked, rumaging around his stuffed backpack, pulling out six or seven packets of Skittles and dumping them all into his mouth at once. His cheeks puffed out and he began to chew.

"What else is new, fatty?" Percy exclaimed, "No… Sorry Grover, it sounds like footsteps."

"Percy?" Annabeth asked kind of scared herself, hoping the scary monsters didn't come hurt her.

"Yeah?"

"Were walking," Annabeth finally realized with a big huge creepy smile spread across her face.

"Oh…"

"Or maybe he heard me." A female voice called from the distance evilly and they all jump seven feet in the air like scared chinchilas.

"Who said that?" They yelled

"Me," said a girl as she stepped out of the shadows.

"Lily?"

"No, it's an ice cream truck..." She replied sarcastically

"Oooo! I'll have this, and this, and this, and this, and this, and this..." Grover exclaimed excitedly and kept poking Lily until she snapped.

"NO! Gods!" She yelled slapping him upside the head.

"Ouchy! YOUR NOT AN ICE CREAM TRUCK, liar." he whimpered softly.

"Oh… I guess I hit to hard?" Lily asked.

"No, Grover's just a wimp." Percy said.

"You hurt my feelings, Percy!" Grover exclaimed, running behind a tree and started to cry his eyes out.

"SHUT UP!"

"So what are you up to?" Lily asked lightly as they kept walking to breakfast.

"Not much, just you know trying to save the world, AGAIN." Percy replied, arrogantly, pulling out riptide and standing on a random stranger...

"So the usual?" she asked.

"Yep, pretty much." Percy replied walking off the stranger as they layed there and basked in his Percy Jackson glory...

"Well, mind if I join you?" She asked.

"Naw, we coo. Les'go." Annabeth tried to act hood but it just didn't work. Lily took this as an everyday thing and just kept going.

"Cool, because I'm bored."

Lily then began to walk ahead. Her chesnut hair colored with electric blue streaks followed her.

"So what was the prophecy this time?" Lily asked, turning her head to talk to the gang. Percy stopped dramatically and paused, standing on another stranger.

"Wow... He's hung with Apollo too much..." Annabeth mumbled, watching her boyfriend be... Himself.

"Go two miles straight

Then eat breakfast

Then turn right.

Find Harmonia, done."

"Well, that's rather challenging..." Lily cried, wiping tears from her eyes.  
"Now we have a problem." Grover yelled as they kept journeying along.

"What now, fatty?" Percy asked, grabbing Annabeth's butt...

"WHAT ARE WE GOING TO EAT FOR BREAKFAST?"  
"Waffles?" Percy threw in the idea before anyone and seemed pretty proud.

"Waffles." Annabeth agreed, smiling, nodding to Lily and Grover.

"MORE CANDY!" Grover shrieked while running in a circle.

"Please don't tell me all he brought was candy and he ate it all!" Lily asked wearily and cowered at the crazed look in Grover's eyes.

"Yep." Both Annabeth and Percy whispered, scared that she'd hit them.

"I hate doing this but we don't have a choice" Lily said.

She brought out some rope and her hammer and walked towards Grover.

Thirty seconds later….

Grover was one the ground tied up and unconscious, and Lily had a rope in her hand that was attached to the ropes binding Grover. She shoved it at Percy and continued to walk ahead as if that were nothing. They looked blankly at her and followed behind her.

"Oh and someone confiscate what's left of the candy" she said sighing.

"Hey, where are we going to eat waffles?"

"Denny's?"

"Sure..."

"But Denny's a far way how can we go there?"

"Plane?" Annabeth suggested

"Sure, but where are we going to get a plane?" Lily asked.

Then an old eskimo with a plane showed up, "Hey, I'm being oober sketchy and picking people up to go to Denny's want to come?"

"You have got to be kidding me!"

"Well, going to get on the plane?" The eskimo asked.

Lily shrugged, "Ugh, I'm going to regret this..."

They got on the plane. Grover sat right next to the small eskimo nearly crushing him. While Percy and Annabeth sat next to each other, Lily sat behind them listening to Guns N' Roses on her iPod. Soon they flew up in to sky and to the Denny's five minutes from where they were.


	3. Chapter 3

As they flew into the air, the old eskimo was being crushed by fat Grover. So halfway through the trip the eskimo picked up his phone and started to call a friend, "Amigo, I don't think I'm going to make it. There's an obese goat sitting next to me, killing me!"

Soon after that phone call, he died. No one noticed because he was hiding under a hood. So our heroes were all sleeping when tragedy struck. The plane crashed into a sign and fell to the ground. Then they landed to the ground with a boom. As soon as that happen, they woke up about three hours later, crawling out of the plane, with Percy saying, "I think the plane landed."

"Same here." Lily decided, and looked confused.

"Um... Where are we?"

"I think a gym..." Annabeth replied, looking up and around the place. Around the choas of the "plane landing," to see people jogging on treadmills, and people suffering the death sentence of curl ups, or push ups, or pull ups.

"How did you figure that?" Lily asked.

"That." She pointed to the guy walking towards them that had a shirt that said, "GYM."

"Maybe that's his name!" Percy argued.

They looked up to see a broken sign that said: PENETTE GYM.

"Oh, I uh, guess you were right..."

"THAT'S RIGHT SO CALLED "BOYFRIEND."" Annabeth scoffed and walked away to a treadmill.

"Well, here comes Gym!" Percy smiled happily as a HUGE body builder walked up to them, with a distasteful look on his face.

"Give me a sit-up or you're out!" He nearly shouted, and Lily and Percy gasped. They didn't want Grover to get started.

"Please don't get Grover started..." Percy told the man.

"What?"

"I don't do up. Sit-ups. Push-ups. Pull-ups. None of that!" Grover replied.

"You got him started!" Percy yelled.

"I do downs. Sit down. Lay down. Blackjack, I'll double down. Give me a cheeseburger, I'll wolf it down. Put on a little music, I'll boogie down. Put I don't do ups, mister! Up defies gravity! Gravity's a law! Unlike some people, I obey the law!" Grover finshed, crossing his arms over his HUGEEEEEEE chest.

"Get out!" Gym yelled, pushing the three kids out, and pulling Annabeth off the treadmill and throwing her into the street. Literallly. Before and 18 wheeler could hit her, Percy grabbed her and jumped out of the way.

"OH PERCY!" Annabeth said dreamily, and started to make out with Percy. It was really gross for Grover and Lily, so they grabbed them by their ears and kept walking.

"Aw, guys, I'm sorry... He just got me started! But uh, where are we gonna stay?" Grover wondered, his ADD taking over.

"Hey guys, there's a motel across the street."

"Sorry doesn't cut it! We could have gotten directions! OHMIGODSSSS, A MOTEL!" Percy yelled, dropping his lover on the concrete.

There it was! A motel. They looked at the big sign that read: WE'RE BROKE STAY HERE MOTEL. They jumped in joy and ran to the hotel. They jay-walked across the street and to the hotel. When they opened the door to the hotel, they saw a pretty sad looking one... It looks like it hasn't been renovated since the Stone Age, really it was that bad... The paint was nearly all gone. The wood had been worn down, the lights were fighting to stay alive. And bugs were popping up here and there. They went to the front desk to see an frail old man with greyish skin, "May I help you kids?"

"We would like one room for two."

"Okay... How long will you be staying?"

"One night."

"Okay, one dollar..."

"One dollar?"

"Yep, one dollar."

"Room for two?" Lily asked, "Don't tell me I'll have to share a bed with Grover..."

"No, Grover will sleep on the pillows we give him."

"Okay... Good." Lily stepping away from Fatt- I mean Grover.

The man gave us the keys and said, "Room 123, second door on your right."

"Oh kayyy? and uh, sir... When was the last time you remodeled this place?"

"If I remember right, when my grandfather ran the place. Which was... Let's see... 1923!"

"Eh... Okay..." Percy replied weirded out.

They walked out of the main room and to their hotel room. Room 123. Percy opened the door and saw that this room was just two mattresses on the floor and an open suitcase, "No wonder it was one dollar."

"Well, only one night right?"

"Yep... One night."

Grover was placed on the floor. Percy and Annabeth shared a bed, and Lily had a bed to herself. Annabeth shut off the light and they fell asleep.


	4. Chapter 4

They were awoken to a smiling waiter. It wasn't like a genuine, cute smile; it was full-on CREEPER smile. He carried a napkin at his arm and wore black pants and a button up shirt. As they reached his facial features, they nearly screamed. It was Luke, but like... More stalkerish.

"Help me." He said through clenched teeth. Percy grabbed his sword and stabbed him and Luke started to have blood gushing out of his stomach.

"Okay cool! Let's go guys!" Annabeth said cheerfully as they skipped down the hall laughing and smiling.

"OHMIGODS!" Grover shrieked on the top of his lungs, looking full of despair.

"What!" Percy.

"ALL MY CANDY IS GONE! WHO ATE IT!" He yelled, and they all stared in shock. Lily looked at Grover's face which was covered in chocolate and candy dye.

"You did, stupid!" She yelled punching him in the left eye.

"I'm blind." He complained and she punched his stomach. As we reached the doors to the hotel, guards appeared.

"Lemme handle this." A new demigod walked up to them and slashed away at the guards.

"WHOA! Who... Are... You?" Percy gasped in shock looking at the brand new demigod who just killed two monster guards.

"My name is Isabella Karina Moonlit Silver Taylor." She smiled, wiping a sad tear from her face.

"What's wrong?" Lily asked in sympathy walking up to Isabella Karina Moonlit Silver Taylor.

"Well, my mom was killed in a plane crash when I was little and my dad... Well I never knew my dad. I'm all alone, roaming the streets with nothing to survive on..."

"AWWW! Come with us!" Percy smiled as he hugged Isabella Karina Moonlit Silver Taylor.

"Aw, thanks Percy." She smiled, even though none of the kids had introduced themselves...

"What nickname can we give you Isabella Karina Moonlit Silver Taylor?" Percy asked in awe at the new Half-Blood.

"Call me Mary-Sue." She smiled, opening the door for the kids to leave the One Dollar Hotel. Mary-Sue skipped happily behind them, handing them fresh baked cookies.

"Oh Mary-Sue! You're so nice!" Grover laughed as he took another cookie.

So they skipped away to breakfast. They looked around for a Denny's and they found one after an hour of looking. It was fifty feet away. But then they were too tired to walk any further. Percy said to everybody, "I'm too tired to continue."

"Do you need help?" A man asked.

"Hanate? Not again!"

"You know this guy?" Lily asked.

"This guy was an idiotic guru who tried to help." Percy groaned.

"Can he help us?"

Hanate heard their conversation, "Yes, for a cheap price."

"Wow. How much. Twelve dollars?" Mary-Sue asked.

"Not twelve dollars." Hanate replied.

"Six dollars?" Annabeth asked.

"Not six dollars." Hanate replied.

"Then how much?" Lily asked.

"Forty-two dollars and ninety-nine cents." Hanate said.

"Forty-two dollars and ninety-nine cents?" Lily exclaimed.

"Just kidding, I'll do free." Hanate replied.

"Okay, you do free." Percy said, "Can you make a ride to take us to Denny's?"

"Sure, I make plane."

"You make plane. Good. Make it."

"No, it already is here." Hanate replied

"Great, so fly it over here to pick us up." Mary-Sue replied.

"I don't have it." Hanate replied.

"What do mean? You just said you had one." Annabeth shot back.

"I lied. But I do have a car."

"Great, let's use that."

"Okay."

With that Hanate sprung off into a crowded Denny's parking lot. They knew it would be awhile, so they fell asleep in some bushes.


End file.
